we seem to have gone off script
let me remind you:
the girl in the elevator with that beanie i’ve seen everywhere asks “what floor?” the doorman tells me to “have a nice day” the cashier at the deli across the street doesn’t say anything actually he just gives me my sandwich with this sort of funny look and a nod my therapist asks “why do you think you do that” taps a pen on his desk peers at me i'm stiff i don't know my friend asks “so what’s all of this about?” gestures vaguely the man on the street asks if i want to buy any roses the woman in front of me in the pharmacy line doesn’t turn around doesn’t ever meet me but i could hear her name and date of birth steal it really if i wanted to i don’t i'm sluggishly slumped drudging my feet forward in this line
(this is when i feel most human)
and you - you say:
“so i’ve been thinking about, you know,
how this all started and
i’m still really into you
and everything, like
i think you’re so cool
but i just don’t think i can
‘do’ exclusivity
right now
i swear to god i wasn’t, like,
trying to lead you on
or anything
and, um, that’s why i’m being honest
even if, you know,
the timing seems bad,
and”
if this is the case,
why do i still feel your hand on my waist
(this is when i feel least human)